Friday, November 27, 2009

Tiger Woods Hits Tree, Recovers Nicely

2009 Australian Masters - Day 4
In the last of a long spate of driver woes, Tiger Woods reportedly backed out of his driveway at 2:25 AM this morning, backed into a fire hydrant, then ricocheted into a tree. Tiger's driving exploits have frequently been troubled by trees. This latest incident only proves that the more time you spend in trees the better you are at escaping the trouble.

It appears that the early reports of Woods being seriously injured were exaggerated. It's now said that the 33 year old suffered facial cuts in the incident with his 2009 Cadillac SUV. A statement from Health Central Hospital read he was, "admitted, treated, and released today in good condition."

Bystanders also reported that after hitting the hydrant and the tree Woods' third shot was a gorgeous approach onto his neighbor's "lawn/green" where he then easily converted a five footer for par. That left his scorecard unblemished in everyone's mind except perhaps for Mrs. Woods who was said to be dismayed by his 2:25 AM tee time. The DNF was Woods' first for the 2009 season.

Til' next,


  1. I'm just now hearing that Tiger won't be playing or even attending his own golf tournament this week. I don't know. Something just doesn't seem quite right here. Where in the world was Tiger going at 2:30 in the morning, leaving his wife and two small kids at home alone? Why would his wife need to break the back window of the car with a golfclub, and, with Herculean strength, pull Tiger out of the car, when all she had to do was open the door (Doesn't she have a key? I understand that she needed to keep her left arm a little straighter, and have a fuller shoulder turn, but otherwise had good form.)? Scratches on Tiger's face? Hmmm. Why is he being so elusive with the police? I'm not suggesting anything sinister is going on or that there's been any hanky-panky, but....

  2. sets,

    Woods appears to be on firm legal ground by hiding, but is losing in the court of public opinion.